Thursday, June 10, 2010

The Relational Life of the Church

Cell Group with a Difference
Pastor Chris Kam, 10/06/2010 1145
Three Dynamic Keys to a Successful Cells
Ministry without people is fun – that’s an oxymoron.
What is the biggest challenge in people ministry? Why do people come to your church / cell group?
Why do people do things?
Duress, Compulsion, Coercion (Involuntarily) Duty,  Obligation, Expectation, Desire, Fulfillment (Voluntarily.)
In a cell group, do they come because they have desire of find fulfillment or is it because of obligation?



Joh 13:15  For I have given you an example, that you also should do just as I have done to you.
Jesus touch people physically, emotionally and spiritually. People are his passion.
Christianity is relationship. That is one word that sums up the Christian faith.
A cell church funnels people into small groups. This allows us to know a new member better. The average Christian speaks no more than 25 words to another Christians in a week. A typical Christian rushed to the service and then rushed off after the service. We don’t meet each other often enough to challenge one another. No wonder the the church is weak. They key to church growth is to close the back door. If we give relationship to a new member, he has a friend and he will continue coming.

A.  Relationship

 - People feel that they are connecting (Do I belong to the group? What can the cell do for me?)
We hold the key to a successful relationship. Sometimes we are in the danger of looking for systems or formulas that work and ignore the fundamental truths. 1 Cor 13 tells us the importance of love.
Four Truths about Leadership and People
  1. People are a church’s more appreciable ASSET. People > Program > Building. Whether a church has a culture for people shows.
  2. A leader’s most important asset is PEOPLE SKILLS. Peter
    Drucker said one skill anyone needs to succeed in any area is people skills. A Dale Carnegie study reveals 90% of people fail because they cannot connect with people.
  3. A good leader can lead various groups because leadership is about PEOPLE.
  4. You can have people skills and not to be a good LEADER , but you cannot be a good leader without people skills.
Mat 22:36-40  "Teacher, which is the great commandment in the Law?"  (37)  And he said to him, "You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.  (38)  This is the great and first commandment.  (39)  And a second is like it: You shall love your neighbor as yourself.  (40)  On these two commandments depend all the Law and the Prophets."
Principle: The way you serve people comes from the way you view your own worth in God. If we are not secured in ourselves, there is no way for us to love others as we should. We must know our identify as a child of God.
Luke 10:30-37
a. The Robbers
  • They used people.
  • They manipulated others.
  • They saw the man as a VICTIM TO EXPLOIT. (e.g. opportunity for MLM.)
b. The Priests
  • They were law keepers.
  • They were pure.
  • They saw the man as a PROBLEM TO AVOID. (Spirtual Taichi.)
c. The Samaritans
  • He was despised.
  • The knew how it felt to be ignored.
  • He saw the man as a PERSON TO BE LOVED.
We often demand people to behave, before they belong to our church to believe. We should allow them to first belong to the church, so they can believe and then have an opportunity to believe.
B. GROWTH
– people feel they are growing. (What can I do for this cell?)
Child > Young Man > Father
A Christian cannot grow by listening to sermons alone.
Definition of Spiritual Leadership: One who assumes responsibility for the health and development of his relationships.
Four Word Pictures
A. The Analogy of the HOST.
(Good hosts take initiative and make others feel comfortable.)
As a leader, you must “host” the relationship and conversations of your life. Leaders are not guests in relationship. Knowing what a good host does in his home. we ought to be able to do it with people everywhere.
B. The Analogy of the DOCTOR.
(Good doctors ask questions. They probe until they see the need.)
As you attempt  to discern people’s needs, ask questions until you discern their condition. Only then do you try to address their needs. Don’t give a prescription before a diagnosis.
C. The Analogy of the COUNSELOR.
(Good counselors are active listeners and interpret what they hear.)
As a leader with solid people skills, you must become an active listener. You should non-verbally communicate that you understand the person and identity with him. We each our right to speak by listening.
D. The Analogy of the TOUR GUIDE.
(Guides don’t merely fellowship with others. they get them to the destination.)
A leader’s people skills must result in his ability to take people to a destination. Our purpose is not to be liked by people, but to take them on a journey and to reach a goal they might not have reached alone.
A leader should take the appropriate role according to the needs of the person they are leading. Our job is to '”connect” with people, so that we can take them on the journey.

C. Contribution

People feel they are contributing  (What can I do for the lost? How can I help the cell to multiply.)
Develop and empower others to do the job. It is in the doing that your members grow.
4 simple steps:
  1. I do, you watch, evaluate
  2. I do, you do, evaluate (e.g. I pray, you share from the Bible)
  3. I watch, you do, evaluate
  4. You do, and others watch, evaluate (they are taking people on their own to equip)
Dependent > Independent > Interdependent
What happens when they are at this stage?
  1. Feel good about themselves. (if the are passionate, they feel good.)
  2. Feel responsible for the group.
  3. Take responsibility for their own growth.
How do we develop others while we delegate the ministry?
  1. Know yourself. Be familiar with the strengths you pass on to others in the  work.
  2. Know the person you wish to develop. Identify his or her strengths and weaknesses.
  3. Clearly define the assignments. Don’t leave anything in question.; write it down.
  4. Teach the “why” behind the assignment. Let them know why it is important.
  5. Discuss their growth process as you go. Talk about how they will grow from it.
  6. Spend relational time with them. Invest time when you are not taking about work
  7. Allow them to watch you minister. Let them observe and get feedback from you.
  8. Give them the resources and authority they need. Provide the tools to do the job.
  9. encourage them to journal during the process. Help them interpret their growth.
  10. Hold them accountable for their ministry. Get permission to keep them in line.
  11. Give them the freedom to fail. Communicated that they can learn as they go.
  12. Debrief and affirm regularly. Encourage them all along the way they succeed.

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